Hidden Thoughts
by Stormwhisper
Summary: A series of oneshots, revealing thoughts about characters who are not primary in the book.
1. Ashfur's Feelings

**Author's note:** This chapter has been rewritten, as will the rest of the chapters very soon. Feel free to suggest other changes, since I'm nowhere near done editing this story.

A cold wind broke through the air, shattering the silence of the night. Leaves rustled loudly against one another, branches hitting against the trunks of trees, water lapping up against the shore. The forest was anything but silent.

Ashfur was beside a stream, awake and aware despite the late hour and the bad weather. He was alone, and no one knew he was there. Ashfur's eyes were fixed on the stream, painting reflections in the water that existed only in his mind. Sadness filled his eyes, but he ignored his own reflection in the stream. He was intent on watching what his imagination alone had created.

Ashfur escaped to the stream usually around once a moon, somewhere where he could think about anything and everything he needed to consider. He came here at night because he didn't want his Clanmates to know, for they didn't understand that he had more on his mind than some others did. He had only visited once every season or so before Squirrelflight had left him. Since then, Ashfur had felt the need for his sanctuary more often than that.

Many things could be considered beside the stream. He thought about apprentices, other warriors, even Firestar. He marvelled at how well Birchfall had trained and grown, wondered if it had had anything to do with his training. He wondered if Firestar's decision was right, to keep Brambleclaw as the deputy even after Graystripe's return to the Clan. Sometimes, he even considered what could have happened if things had gone differently in his life.

He spent many nights thinking about Squirrelflight, and what could have happened between them. On that night, just like countless others, he was thinking about her.

Ashfur knew that she truly loved Brambleclaw, and perhaps he had always known that. But even though he knew that she was happier now, he still longed for her to return to him. Ashfur knew what would have happened without Brambleclaw. They would have had a family. Hollypaw, Lionpaw and Jaypaw would not exist. Instead, there would be three of his kits there, learning and growing.

This was one of the things that Ashfur constantly returned to. If he hadn't lost Squirrelflight, they would have surely had kits. And Ashfur knew what those kits would have been like, if they had had the chance to live. If not for Brambleclaw, the kits would be there, with him.

Ashfur had always imagined the first as a brown tabby, like Squirrelflight's sister, Leafpool. He would have been a proud and arrogant tom, constantly getting into trouble for misbehaving and not respecting those older than him. Nonetheless, he would train well, and would begin to learn how to act around others. When he finally became a warrior, he would be well respected and would have learned how to act around others.

Ashfur could see the tom's naming ceremony clearly in his mind. Firestar would praise him on learning to get past his initial personality, much like Squirrelflight had been when she was young, and learned to thrive in the Clan. Firestar would tell him that he was one of the best fighters in the Clan, and that he might someday become deputy. And then Firestar would give him the name Sootpelt.

Ashfur had chosen the name because it reminded him of his own name. He had also decided to name one of the other kits Flamewind, after Firestar's name and Squirrelflight's appearance, but he hadn't poured as much thought into him as he had in Sootpelt. Sootpelt was the cat that Ashfur wished more than anything had been born.

Ashfur was still staring into the water, imagining the broad-shouldered tom that could have been his son—that _would _have been his son.

_Brambleclaw caused all this,_ Ashfur thought. If he had said the words aloud, they would have dripped with venom. Ashfur hated no cat more than he did Brambleclaw right then. He wished that Brambleclaw had never set his eyes on Squirrelflight, that Squirrelflight had never fallen for him.

But sadly, that had never happened.


	2. Breezepaw's Displeasure

Breezepaw walked away from the rest of the sleeping cats, already grumpy. The past few days, he had been attempting to get Heatherpaw up and about, trying to get her to come out and hunt with him. But every time he'd ask she'd turn him down, her voice either emotionless or filled with sadness. It was really getting on Breezepaw's nerves.

Why did Heatherpaw insist on dwelling on her _friendship_ with Lionpaw? If it really was only a friendship that she had been enjoying, than why was she so sad? Breezepaw didn't understand Heatherpaw. Even if it hadn't been a friendship, Lionpaw was ThunderClan foxdung. What could Heatherpaw see in him?

Breezepaw stalked angrily out of camp, his black fur bristling with anger. He was angry with Heatherpaw, but the dislike he was feeling for her was nothing compared to the hatred he felt for Lionpaw. Why couldn't the ThunderClan cat have made friends inside his own Clan, instead of making Heatherpaw so sad?

If Breezepaw had been just a bit more reckless, he would have hunted Lionpaw down and made him pay for dampening Heatherpaw's spirit like this. But Breezepaw's desire to become a warrior overrode his hunger for revenge, mainly because it would not make Heatherpaw any happier. Breezepaw doubted that hunting down a cat from a different Clan and hurting him would make Whitetail suggest him to become a warrior.

_Still, there must be something I can do, _Breezepaw thought. He was still walking, carrying himself over the moorland and across WindClan territory. Breezepaw was hurrying, as if he though somewhere he went would ease the worry he felt for Heatherpaw. It was certainly not something that would happen overnight.

Breezepaw stopped finally, breathless. Was there nothing he could do to help his friend? Killing Lionpaw wouldn't help her, and it would probably only make her feel worse, though it would certainly put Breezepaw in a better mood. He'd tried just being there for her in her time of need, but that wasn't working, either.

Breezepaw began walking back towards camp, slower this time. Breezepaw knew that his mentor would not be pleased. Whitetail didn't like it when he was not there to train, nor was he hunting to feed the elders. In a clan where prey was so rare, not doing something productive at all times was simply frowned upon, not to mention harmful to one's self.

Whitetail was waiting for him impatiently when he returned, looking annoyed. "Where have you been, Breezepaw? I don't see that you have caught anything for the elders."

"I'm sorry, Whitetail," Breezepaw meowed, dipping his head in shame and embarrassment. "I just needed a few moments to clear my head."

To Breezepaw's surprise, Whitetail did not tell him not to waste time or lecture him on the importance of hunting and training, but simply nodded knowingly. "Come on then, Breezepaw," Whitetail meowed. "I'm going to see how fast you can run today, to see if we need to practice any of that anymore."

Breezepaw nodded, grinning at the suggestion. This was one of the best parts of belonging to WindClan. Swiftness was an important part of being a WindClan cat, and much of the training time was spent on increasing speed.


	3. Feathertail's Sorrow

Feathertail had been a RiverClan cat. Her parents had been the late Silverstream, of RiverClan, and Graystripe, of ThunderClan. She and her brother, Stormfur, had been born just as their mother had died, and Graystripe had joined RiverClan to be with them. He had later returned to ThunderClan, but had continued to see them at Gatherings. Things had been normal until StarClan had sent her a prophecy. 

Feathertail had followed StarClan's instructions and, in result, had been killed saving cats that she barely knew. It had been an honourable way to die, and she would be remembered for her bravery for many moons. When she had died, she had been granted a great honour. She was allowed to walk two skies, become a member of the Tribe of Endless Hunting and StarClan. She had been reunited with many cats she had lost over time, but most importantly, her mother.

However, things were not perfect.

Feathertail's sacrifice had not gone without regret on her own part. Feathertail had not only left behind her brother, Stormfur, and her father, Graystripe, but also another. Crowfeather, an apprentice at the time, had been the love of her life. Though younger than her, they had been meant for each other.

Death had been meant to separate them all along, but Feathertail had always longed for her destiny to be different. It was not just her own death that hurt, but the fact that Crowfeather had moved on. Of course, she had wanted it for him, but to see him with Leafpool… It was difficult to see him so happy.

But even worse was when they were forced to part ways, and Crowfeather's world had been so engulfed in sorrow. Feathertail could only feel worse when she thought of his sadness. When he had chosen Nightcloud as his new mate, Feathertail didn't even feel jealous. She knew his true motives.

Resenting Crowfeather was out of the question, as was blaming StarClan for her death. But even spending time with Silverstream or watching her dear brother didn't make her feel better. Crowfeather had been the only cat she had ever loved, and now they could never be together.

Feathertail was visiting the skies of the Tribe of Endless Hunting one night, watching as the tribe cats continued on their lives, many still remembering her, a great deal of them having met with her. Star, a cat she had met only briefly in her life but that she knew well in her death, was with her.

"He's happy, Feathertail. You should be too."

Star's words were filled with wisdom, and Feathertail nodded as she said them.

"You are very wise," Feathertail meowed, and smiled, suddenly feeling absolutely cheerful. It was a rare feeling for her, something she had not felt since her death.

And so, keeping Star's words in her mind, Feathertail returned to her own sky of StarClan. For the first time since she died, she looked down at Crowfeather, who was training his son happily. Feathertail smiled with him. She was finally at peace.


	4. Tawnypelt's Misery

Tawnypelt's life had never been simple.

From the time when she had been a kit, things had been complicated for her because of her father. Tigerstar was well known and hated throughout the forest, and being his daughter was not an easy feat. There was a certain expectation of her to turn rotten, and whenever she made the slightest mistake, something that would have been overlooked in an instant had she been anyone else, it was taken as a sign that she was just like her father. It was a lot of pressure.

Tawnypelt had tried her best to break free of this darkness within ThunderClan, but such a thing seemed impossible. Tigerstar had been well-liked and trusted in ThunderClan for a long time before he showed his true colours, and many cats were wary that the same would occur with his kits. Brambleclaw, her brother, had been in the same situation, but he had seemed less affected by it. He just kept fighting to be trusted, even though he was identical to Tigerstar, and had gained even more suspicion than Tawnypelt.

Tawnypelt tried her best to rise above the suspicions of her Clan and become a well-liked and hard working apprentice, but it simply wasn't working. An idea presented itself soon, and it began to grow and grow until she could think of nothing more than it. The plan wasn't perfect, far from it. But it would give her at least a chance of acceptance, and she could fight even harder if she chose to do take the path less traveled instead of trying to go through a difficult life in ThunderClan. It just might work…

Joining ShadowClan only got more suspicion and hidden hatred from ThunderClan cats, but she saw that some ShadowClan cats respected her for the decision. It was hard to be apart from Brambleclaw, but it was a sacrifice she was willing to make. She could see her brother every so often, at gatherings, and otherwise she could deal with life without him. Although not a natural thing to do, abandoning her brother had given her the opportunity to open the door to acceptance. If ShadowClan accepted her, then she could truly be happy.

They watched her just as closely as ThunderClan, itching to get rid of her if she did as much as step out of line. But Tawnypelt didn't give them the chance. She could still hear them call her a half Clan cat, but it didn't bother him. Because, after a time, those who disliked her were only jealous, and the others had accepted her. She had even found Russetfur wanted to be especially close with her, which pleased her. It would be perfectly normal to find a mate within ShadowClan.

Difficulties did arise when tension arose between ShadowClan and ThunderClan, but she had already made up her mind about her loyalties. She'd try to avoid direct fighting with Brambleclaw, but she would fight his friends and loved ones without hesitation. If she didn't have an option, then she would attack Brambleclaw, and fight him as fiercely as she possibly could. She was just dying to see the look on the faces of the ShadowClan cats when they saw her leave Brambleclaw running away with his tail between his legs.

It never came down to a fight between ThunderClan and ShadowClan, and Tawnypelt was never forced to go up against her brother. Instead of a regular reaction—thanks—Tawnypelt was disappointed. She was willing to do anything to prove her loyalty to her new Clan, and if she couldn't prove it now, then there would still be doubt about how much she really cared about Brambleclaw. Until she could show her lack of loyalty to Brambleclaw, she had no choice but to take any insults that were hurtled her way about family loyalties.

And then StarClan sent her a dream. It sent her on a journey across a world that had always been far beyond her reach in the past. The trip would have been a good sign of her loyalty to her Clan, if it had not been done with cats of other Clans. But even that would have been all right, if the cat sent by ThunderClan had not been none other than Brambleclaw, her brother. It only raised more questions about whether or not she was truly loyal, and Tawnypelt was beginning to wonder if there was time enough in her entire lifetime to prove her loyalty to ShadowClan.

But as time passed, respect began to build in her honour. Even ShadowClan cats could not deny that she was beginning to prove that, despite everything, she really was a strong cat that wanted nothing more than to fit in to her Clan and prove that she would always be loyal to them. Strangely, after all this time, it seemed that it was finally beginning to work. Faith was building in her from many cats in her Clan, and suddenly there were many cats supporting her instead of shunning her. She was suddenly beginning to outgrow Tigerstar's shadow.

Every so often, Tawnypelt's mind would wander back to her family. Brambleclaw was still alive and well, and she could see him every so often. Tigerstar was dead, though this caused her no sadness whatsoever. Goldenflower had recently died, and this was hurtful, but it didn't matter as much as it should have. The elderly she-cat hadn't known her daughter for long, and she had not been able to raise Tawnypelt as she should have. Now that she was gone, the only thing that she really missed was knowing that she would never be able to have a relationship with her mother. When Tawnypelt's own kits were born, she knew that she never wanted to let them go.

All together, Tawnypelt's life had been miserable. But it was getting better.


End file.
